
Parent and Carer Information​
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Petra and the Brightest Star - A story about loss
How do we use the book?
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Thank you for purchasing Petra and the Brightest Star, and welcome to our information area. This section is separate from the story pages, designed to support you as you help your child navigate grief.
Loss can bring a wide range of emotions, from sadness and confusion to anger and anxiety. Here, you’ll find information about these feelings, guidance on using play to support emotional expression, and practical tips for helping your child through their grief, from a children's therapist with years of experience supporting children and families through loss.
The therapeutic story​
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This story uses the simple but powerful metaphor of a star in the sky to represent the love we have for someone special. Petra, a small planet, has always felt comforted by the brightest star in her sky —bright, steady, and always there. But one day, the star disappears, leaving Petra feeling lost and unsure, as though a part of her world has gone dark.
The helper in this story is Mr. Moon, a wise figure who gently helps Petra to understand that although the star is no longer visible, her light hasn’t truly vanished. Through his comforting words and guidance, Petra learns that love is like the light of a star—it remains with us, even when we can no longer see it in the sky.
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A closer look at loss
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At some point, we will all experience the loss of someone we love. For children, understanding death can be difficult, and as parents, we naturally want to protect them from the pain. Young children experience and express their grief differently to adults, as their understanding of death evolves over time and as they develop. They may not yet grasp its permanence, sometimes believing the person will return or that their own thoughts or actions caused the loss—this is known as magical thinking. Because their emotions can be overwhelming and difficult to put into words, grief may show up in their behaviour, such as increased clinginess, outbursts, or regression in areas like sleep or toileting. Children often move in and out of grief, revisiting questions and emotions as they grow and their understanding deepens. Providing patience, reassurance, and space to express their feelings—through words or play—can help them navigate their loss in a way that feels safe.
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.​​​​Emotions at Play has connection at it's very core, and reading a story together is a wonderful way of connecting with a child. You will have heard us talk about ‘the magic recipe’ here at Emotions at Play, and, we like to think about the relationship between yourself and your child as the container for this recipe. As you explore the book together, you will find plenty of ingredients to add to your pot, but the key part of the magic is you.​​
Let 'Rags' be your guide- Our trusty mascot is on hand to guide you through the story. Rags will lead you to fun games, experiments and crafty ideas to bring the story from the page and into your child’s world.
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'I wonder' statements - Often used in therapeutic conversation in place of 'why'questions,
'I wonder' statements are much softer and don't force a response. Our young people do not always have the answer to 'why', but 'I wonder if..' brings about a shared curiosity and a feeling of being on the journey together. It's only a slight change of words yet it can make a real difference.
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The child always leads - A really important piece in Emotions at Play is that the child leads and the adult follows. Play is a child's natural mode of expression, so if we lead, we simply take over the conversation and suppress our child. Our books are filled with activities and ideas to ignite your child's curiosity. They are offered, but never forced.
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Pick the right time - Make sure that your are emotionally regulated within yourself before starting the story. If you are feeling stressed or are trying to sandwich it in between activities, you won't be able to fully focus on your child. Take time to breathe and settle so that you are in an emotional state that will support your child. Put your mobile phone on silent to allow this special time to be just between you.

How can I support my child through a bereavement?
Provide structure for reassurance
Young children thrive on routine, and during times of change, maintaining daily routines as much as possible can help them feel more secure. Consistent meal times, bedtimes, and familiar activities give children a sense of stability, helping them process their grief without feeling overwhelmed by the uncertainty that often accompanies loss.
Seek support for yourself
It is important to take care of your own emotional well-being too. Grieving is a challenging process, and seeking support from friends, family, or a professional can help you cope. When you have the space to process your own emotions, you’ll be better equipped to support your child through theirs.
Take time to listen (and play)
Children often communicate their feelings through actions rather than words, and taking time to engage in the natural language of play with your child can offer a safe space for them to express and process their grief in a non-threatening way and at their own pace. Grief can bring out a range of behaviours in young children, including irritability, withdrawal, or connection-needing behaviours. These are natural reactions to the stress and confusion of loss. Be patient and compassionate with your child, offering comfort and understanding, while also setting gentle boundaries. Over time, as they process their feelings, these behaviours will likely ease.
Tell me more about the activities and the benefits of play
In your book, alongside the therapeutic story, you will find art, craft, science, games and sensory activities guided by our mascot, Rags
Art- Drawing, painting, sketching; all wonderful ways for us to unconsciously convert what is going on inside us to the outside. We don't need to interpret or understand our art to benefit from it, and there are no rights and wrongs in how we make art.
Science - Science is a great way to get curious about our experiences. Experimenting with ideas and problem solving can create new neural pathways to help us.
Games - The opposite to a passive learning experience, games often involve movement and by engaging in activities, we come to see problems from different angles. Aside from the serious stuff, games are fun, and improve connection, social skills and self esteem.
Sensory - Because the 'thinking' part of the child's brain is the last to develop, sensory activities meet children where they are developmentally. Involving the five senses of sight, touch, taste, hearing, and smell, provides a multi sensory experience beyond the written word.
Crafts- Crafting is a lovely way to make a thought, a character or a feeling into a more concrete form that we can see and interact with. The story can be lifted from the pages through a creation, and lots of valuable problem solving takes place. Nothing is prescriptive in Emotions at Play activities, and if a child decides to go in a different direction with their craft making then this is absolutely okay! The child leads, and we follow.
Connection - Our stories and resources are all designed to put the relationship first and connection at the starting point. Children need their adults in order to self-regulate, grow and learn about the world and their place in it.​
Child led - The foundation of play therapy is that the child leads the play. This is because we know that play is how our children communicate their inner world. Through child led play, children learn that their inner world is heard and understood, and that they are valued and respected humans.​​



Rags' Activity Guidance
1. Science - Make a Star seeker
All you need is a torch, toilet roll tube, paper and an elastic band to see the stars! Make some little holes in your paper, fasten to the tube and shine the torch light inside to see your wall covered in stars. Rags tip - Turn off the lights or find a dark place for the best effect. Not got a torch? Wait til it's dark and use your telescope to spot some real stars in the sky instead! Are any out tonight? What else do you see through your telescope?
2. Sensory - Star and Heart Breathing
Mr Moon sits with Petra while she lets out her tears. Deep breathing can help us when we have big emotions. Use your finger to follow along the breathing boards to try different types of calm breathing. Rags tip - Practice this breathing with your child when they are regulated, so that they are easier to remember when they need them. Can you think of any other shapes for big calm breaths? (Download your printable breathing boards in our shop, using the code BreatheWithPetra)
3. Rags asks - Do you have any special memories of special people?
Rags gently offers ‘wonderings’ throughout the story, creating space for your child to connect Petra’s journey to their own experiences. These moments are never forced but serve as gentle invitations for reflection. Your child may choose to engage, or simply listen. You can support this by modelling—sharing a happy memory of someone important to you can help them feel safe in expressing their own thoughts and feelings.
4. Games
These simple games help strengthen your bond with your child, making you feel more in tune with each other.
"What did I change?" encourages your child to pay close attention to you, building their focus and observation skills. Noticing small details about someone they love helps them feel connected and reassured.
"Movement chain" strengthens this connection through play and shared creativity. By taking turns adding to the pattern, you and your child practice listening, taking turns, and working together. This playful back-and-forth helps children feel noticed and valued.
Both games create moments of shared joy, building trust and emotional security—important foundations for helping children through big feelings, including grief.
5. Rags asks - what colour do you think the sparkly chain of hearts might be? Perhaps it would be the stars favourite colour? This question supports the child to create a tangible image of the sparkly chain of hearts in their minds.
6.Craft - Make a memory paper chain.
Whilst Petra thought about her happy memories of the star, they became a beautiful chain of hearts. You could draw or write special memories on strips of paper and fasten them together in a big chain for all to see.
7.Art - Who and what fills your heart?
Draw a big heart and invite your child to fill it with pictures of the people, places, and things they love! This is a child-led activity, meaning they get to decide what belongs in their heart. Some choices may surprise you—perhaps a favourite toy, a character from a story, or even a special rock they found in the park! Whatever they include, accept it with curiosity and warmth.
Rags tip - You can gently support them by asking open-ended questions like, “Who makes you feel happy?” or “Is there a place where you feel really safe?” But the magic of this activity is in letting your child take the lead. There are no right or wrong answers—just a beautiful collection of what makes their heart feel full. By embracing their choices, you help create a space where they feel seen, understood, and secure in expressing themselves.
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